When someone we care about is going through a tough time, like dealing with a cancer or other illness, it can be hard to know how to help. If your friend has cancer, you might feel worried, sad, or even a little scared. These feelings are normal, but remember that you can still be an amazing friend. Here’s a guide on how you can support your friend through this challenging time.
Be There for Them
One of the best ways you can help your friend is by simply being there. This doesn’t mean you have to be with them all the time, but it does mean letting them know you care.
- Listen to Them: Sometimes, your friend might just want to talk. Be a good listener. You don’t have to say much; just letting them share their feelings can make a big difference.
- Be Patient: Your friend might have days when they feel sad, angry, or tired. Understand that these feelings are part of what they’re going through. Be patient and let them know it’s okay to feel however they feel.
Stay Connected
Cancer treatments can make it hard for your friend to do all the things they used to, like going to school or playing outside. But staying connected is still super important.
- Send Cards or Letters: If your friend is too tired to meet in person, sending a thoughtful card or letter can brighten their day. Write about the fun things you’re aware are happening or share a joke to make them smile.
- Video Calls: If they can’t see you in person, try video chatting. You can still play games, watch movies, or just talk like you would if you were together.
Help Them Feel Normal
When someone has cancer, it might feel like everything in their life has changed. One of the best things you can do is help your friend feel normal, like before.
- Do the Same Things: If your friend feels up to it, do the things you used to do together. Play games, watch your favorite shows, or just hang out. These familiar activities can bring comfort.
- Include Them in Plans: Even if your friend can’t always join in, invite them anyway. They’ll appreciate knowing you still want them around.
Offer to Help
Sometimes your friend or their family might need help, and offering to lend a hand can be a great way to show you care.
- Run Small Errands: Maybe you can help by picking up homework, delivering a meal, or just helping out with small chores.
- Be a Homework Buddy: If your friend is missing school, offer to help with their homework. It can help them keep up with schoolwork and feel like they’re still part of the class.
Learn About Cancer Together
Understanding what your friend is going through can help you be a better support. Ask your parents or teachers for age-appropriate information about cancer.
- Ask Questions: If your friend is okay with it, ask them how they’re feeling or what the treatment is like. This shows that you care and are interested in their experience.
- Respect Their Privacy: If your friend doesn’t want to talk about their illness, that’s okay too. Respect their wishes and talk about other things instead.
Be Positive and Encouraging
A little positivity can go a long way when someone is going through something tough.
- Send Positive Messages: Share encouraging words, send them funny memes, or draw pictures to brighten their day. Remember however, avoid making comments such as “it’ll be ok” or “you’ll get better” as although well-intentioned and positive, they may not reflect your friend’s reality and may have the opposite effect to what you intended.
- Celebrate Small Wins: Whether it’s finishing a round of treatment or just having a good day, celebrate these moments with your friend.
Take Care of Yourself
Supporting a friend with cancer can be hard, and it’s important to take care of your own feelings too.
- Talk to Someone: If you’re feeling sad or worried, talk to an adult you trust. It’s okay to share your feelings and ask for help when you need it.
- Keep Doing What You Love: It’s important to keep doing the things you enjoy, like playing sports, reading, or spending time with other friends. Taking care of yourself will help you be a better friend.
Conclusion
Supporting a friend with cancer is a big responsibility, but it’s also a special way to show how much you care. By being there, staying connected, helping them feel normal, offering help, learning together, staying positive, and taking care of yourself, you can make a big difference in your friend’s life. Remember, just being a friend is already an amazing gift.